It’s all over the news. Musk trying to blame democrats for the attacks on Tesla. And republicans are humpin’ the mic, too, trying to reverse the blame, as former Wisconsin senator David Craig does in his ridiculous op-ed. Craig’s tactic is a pretty typical one among republicans. He spins the Musk outrage as being driven by public sector employees and their political allies, characterizing them as an “overlord.” He backs this utter nonsense with several more false claims: that democrats showed no concern for private sector workers during the COVID-19 pandemic (they actually provided more pandemic relief for the private sector than the republicans did), that federal workers make more than private sector workers do (I’m sure he’s aware that federal workers, having been one himself, have modest income caps, whereas private sector incomes are unlimited and overall much higher) and that those who are boycotting Tesla are trying to oust Tesla workers (if anyone is trying to oust people, it’s Musk, Trump and congressional republicans, and they’re doing it to consolidate political power and not to cut spending, otherwise they wouldn’t be handing over $4.5 trillion of our tax dollars to the real overlords, American multi-billionaires).
On top of the privatize-nationalize-politicize-stratify-everything republicans, there are a few democrats who oppose the Tesla boycotts. Like this self-proclaimed “liberal Jew,” who calls the anti-Musk protests “performative ideological litmus tests.” Unfortunately, the only litmus test he provides for his opposition to the Tesla boycott is that he owns a Tesla. And beware, performative ideologues, he is ready with “a bucket of warm soapy water” for anyone who would dare paint a swastika on his car.
Both the nationalizing-privatizing-politicizing-stratifying-everything republicans and the high-road liberals can put their guilt trip back where they found it: up their asses. The boycotts have been surprisingly effective. They have brought Tesla stock down 43% since its peak, and the ruthless Nazi carpetbagger, Musk, is planning to go back to being a private douchebag instead of a public one. All I have to say is, thank you, boycotters, for getting this carcinogenic asshole to go back to selling plastic-coated batteries on wheels.
As for the high-road liberals, they’re on the high road to hell. They’re cowering behind a bankrupt dignity, while a sebaceous nerd with a chainsaw hunts them down. Even having made the mistake of buying a Tesla, they can’t seem to appreciate the blessings of the Tesla boycott. Do they not comprehend that empowered consumers have effectively replaced effete politicians? I know that some are confused, because they thought Musk’s car was good for the planet. Seeing as they make enough to buy a Tesla, they should consider trading it in for one of TopGear’s top 20 electric cars, which are just as good, if not better, for the planet. Oh, I forgot, the Trump-Musk tariffs on foreign cars will make only one of these top 20 electric cars affordable: the Tesla Model 3. But that shouldn’t stop them from boycotting Tesla, when Chevy, Ford, GMC… I’ll just get to the point: Tesla is just one of a plethora of electric cars on the planet that these high-road democrats are out to save. And if they already own a Tesla, why not drop the post hoc justification? Musk has been a known Nazi douchebag for at least a decade. Just fess up that you made a mistake and openly regret it. It’s useless to put on the same save-the-world airs that Musk himself puts on.
Which brings me to the claim that it’s anti-democratic to boycott Tesla. In a free-market capitalist country, where government is a rich man’s whore, nothing is more democratic than a boycott. It’s the only legal way for regular folks (the demos) to keep big business from buying politicians. Why shouldn’t we restrict the South African vampire’s blood supply? He’s dismantling our democratic institutions to install an authoritarian regime. Sorry, but to preserve democracy, we need to be remorselessly boycotting the fucker and to keep boycotting him. Besides, “We the People” don’t need permission to boycott anything. The only ones who should feel guilty for killing American jobs are Trump, Musk and their supporters.
The guilt trip over the Tesla boycott is really about tamping down the power that consumers wield in a consumer economy, which is the power of choice. They think that by shaming congressional democrats for not speaking out against the vandalism of Musk’s vehicles, charging stations and showrooms, they’re going to assuage an outraged public. As if the congressional democrats owed Lucifer and Mammon an apology. As if the outraged public gave a shit what congressional democrats thought of the boycott. As if the Douchey Duo weren’t themselves 100% responsible for pissing off the public. Let the congressional democrats remain mum. Or better yet, let them grow the gonads to loudly and clearly put the blame back where it belongs: on Musk’s doorstep in a burning paper bag.
Sometimes self-respect involves not respecting those who don’t respect you. Sometimes it’s not good for your brand to roll over every time Bubba needs some love. Sometimes it’s better to stop sitting licking your wounded anus and to get scrappy. Polls show that the democratic party’s approval rating is now at 27%. Could it go any lower for standing up and taking a swing at the so-called “existential threat to democracy” they descried in the 2024 presidential election? Why not applaud, encourage and prolong the boycott? They’ve nothing to lose. If an non-elected multi-billionaire could gut democratic institutions to consolidate political power under a fascist dictator and claim, “That’s how democracy works,” then democrats could surely show the fucker how capitalism works. If Trump could promote Tesla on the White House lawn, why shouldn’t democrats openly and brazenly get behind a Tesla boycott?
“But the vandalism.” Let’s face it, the vandalism isn’t domestic terrorism; it’s burning Elon in effigy. And, as sure as shit falls, Elon will never take responsibility for pissing people off. Like every rich and powerful fuck before him, he’ll never admit to having done anything to warrant the anger of the people whose lives he’s ruined. Basking in obscene lucre and lavished with praise by hordes of toadies, he’s incapable of comprehending why anyone would be angry with him, much less angry enough to torch a few of his cars, charging stations and dealerships. Did Mussolini think that he deserved to be hung from a lamp post by an angry mob?
Musk doesn’t know how lucky he is that the outrage has been so low-key. No one has bombed his factories, sniped him from a rooftop or even pissed in his latte. So far, the vast majority of the so-called outrage has been relatively pacific. People have simply refused to buy his product. Ignore the guilt trip and the useless dignity. Let’s keep this boycott rolling and building until it crushes Tesla. Huzzah!